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“Champagne Networking – How to Create Meaningful
Relationships with Mentors, Influencers, and Strategic
Partners to Grow Your Business”
Jordana Interviews Selena Soo
Transcript from March 11, 2013
Selena Soo (founder of S2 Groupe) is a
business strategist for personal brands,
focusing on marketing and publicity. Her
mission is to help visionary entrepreneurs,
experts, and coaches reach more people
and change the world. Selena received her
MBA from NYU Stern and her BA from
Columbia University. She loves living in
NYC, where she throws champagne
networking brunches and teaches her
signature course Elevate Your Brand.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana:
Welcome everyone. This is Jordana Jaffe, founder of Embarkability.
Thank you so much for joining us for the New Entrepreneur’s
Business Blueprint where 20 experts will tell you everything you need
to know to generate consistent cash flow, make a big impact and
keep the faith during your first two years of business.
I created this event because I speak to women every day who just
started a business or who have been in business for a few years and
they are really struggling to get clients, make money and stay
positive throughout it all.
So many women decide to start a business because they feel like it’s
the key to living their dream life. The thing is that it really can be if
they are shown how because when left to our own devices things
tend to come up, whether it’s our own fears or resistance, or else it’s
literally not knowing what to do next.
These women are scared, overwhelmed and feel really alone. The
thing is that they don’t have to. Yet all the while they know deep in
their core that they have a strong purpose and have some valuable
and unique offers to give to the world.
With all this in mind, I wanted to bring something to you. I gathered
this amazing group of women entrepreneurs who, like me, all
experienced these things at some point in the beginning of their
business journeys but somehow or another they made it out on the
other side and are experiencing big success today.
They are all in different industries and have different backgrounds but
they were all committed to their success, which I find to be so
inspiring. That is why I have decided to bring them all here in one
place so that they can share their secrets with you this week.
For those of you who don’t know me well, I am the owner and
founder of Embarkability.com and I work with women all around the
world to help them start and grow their own successful businesses.
I believe that every woman entrepreneur has the ability to create her
own successful business and this week is all about showing you step
by step how to do just that.
I started my first business back in 2007 without knowing the first
thing about entrepreneurship. In fact, I was an English major and
never took one class that was even remotely related to starting a
business. I didn’t take an econ class or sales or marketing; nothing.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Essentially I was 100% absolutely clueless but I decided that I would
be okay with that. The only reason that I was okay with that was
because I decided that I would rather feel totally scared and clueless
about building a business than to continue to feel totally scared and
clueless about what I really wanted to do with my life.
I knew that there had to be a way to make money and find clients
doing what I love to do so, from scratch, I created my own organizing
business and paved my way as a successful entrepreneur.
It wasn’t easy. I spent the first few years overwhelmed with anxiety,
frustration and constant fears about money. There would be
moments of wins but I couldn’t manage to consecutively make the
kind of money I wanted to be making or find the clients I dreamed of
helping.
I was stuck in feast and famine cycles but it was my commitment to
my vision, staying focused and pushing through the difficulties that
really helped me get to where I am today.
As I said, I have brought together this group of amazing women
entrepreneurs to share their strategies and support while you grow
your own successful business. If you miss any of the calls make sure
to go to NewEntrepreneurBusinessBlueprint.com/replay and the
replays will be available for 24 hours after each call.
Now I am so excited to welcome Selena Soo who is going to share
with you how to create meaningful relationships with mentors,
influencers and strategic partners to grow your business.
I have had the pleasure of knowing Selena for some time now and
what I love about her work is that she makes networking with her
peers and connecting with mentors so simple and accessible to us all.
She really breaks everything down to steps that suddenly seem really
doable. What she does for people is simply amazing.
Selena is a business strategist for personal brands and she focuses
on marketing and publicity. Her mission is to help visionary
entrepreneurs, experts and coaches reach more people and change
the world.
Selena received her MBA from NYU Stern and her BA from Columbia
University. She loves living in New York City where she throws
champagne networking brunches and teaches her signature course,
Elevate Your Brand.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Welcome, Selena. I am so thrilled to have you here today.
Selena:
Hi, Jordana. Thank you so much for having me.
Jordana:
Of course. I’m so glad that you're here.
Selena, today and since the day I met you, you have just beyond
impressed me. I believe you’ve impressed everyone who hears your
story and what you're up to, especially in such a little time since you
only started your business officially over the past year.
Before we dive in, give the listeners just a bit about your background
and how it all started for you.
Selena:
I went to Columbia University and when I graduated all I really knew
was that I wanted to make a difference. I saw this stark contrast
between going to corporate America and working at Goldman Sachs
or working at a non-profit, which I ended up doing at one point.
I have always been driven by being of service. It’s become really
clear to me over time that my passion and purpose is to promote
visionary people who have these amazing ideas to share that I think
can really transform people’s lives. I’m all about helping people
improve the quality of their lives.
Right before business school I worked at a non-profit called Step Up
Women’s Network. It’s a professional women’s organization. It was
pretty cool because I was in charge of their New York membership
and also produced their professional development programming. In
the process, I got to meet so many amazing women like editors-inchief of magazines and CEOs. It really helped build my network. My
job was basically networking all day and creating programming to
help women, which is what I loved.
Then I went to business school. I didn’t really have a lot of formal
business experience although I had worked in non-profit and a very
entrepreneurial scrappy environment so I had to learn how to be
entrepreneurial. That really served me.
What I do right now is work with entrepreneurs to help them become
more visible. It’s just something I’m really passionate about. I think
it’s important to share that I came from non-profit and then did this.
I think many times people think, “I need to keep doing what I’ve
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
done before,” but you can really choose to do anything. If you put
your mind to it you can achieve great things.
Jordana:
Yes, and that is definitely something that I want to address later on
in our call today; the whole mindset around this. I think that’s
something that really stops people from getting to where they want
to be.
Let’s talk about why you feel like cultivating relationships with
influencers is the fastest and more powerful way to elevate your
brand.
Selena:
To answer that question I’m going to share a story. Let’s imagine that
there is this woman named Jane and she is looking for a health
coach. As we know, she has thousands of options but she narrows it
down to two people.
There is one health coach who has this great website, wonderful
experience and all these degrees. Then there is a second health
coach that she is considering. This health coach doesn’t even have a
website. There’s not much information about her. The one thing that
she does know is that this person is Oprah’s life coach.
When you're given those two options, who would the person pick? It’s
obvious. The person would pick Oprah’s life coach even if they had no
other information. The decision has been made.
That’s why I think, to really stand out from the crowd and
differentiate yourself, there is nothing more powerful than having
someone influential endorse your work.
I don’t mean you need Oprah specifically to endorse your work. With
what each of us is doing there are people who are influential to our
potential clients. Those are the people that we really should be
connecting with.
It’s definitely important to get testimonials in general on your website
but I would say that whether it’s a health coach or a business coach,
if there is a testimonial it’s going to be good.
I’ve read things like “I helped someone make an extra $5,000” or “I
tripled their revenues.” but it’s all the same thing. It’s not really
distinguishing yourself. If you have someone really exceptional
endorsing you it just puts you in an entirely different level.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana:
I totally see that and I feel that myself. I definitely feel like when I go
to people’s websites and I see that they have endorsements from
really impressive people, it definitely stops you in your tracks. You
see the person differently.
With that in mind, how did you get such glowing testimonials from
people like Danielle LaPorte and Marie Forleo within only a month of
launching your business?
Selena:
I know, it was a really short time. It was interesting because when I
launched my business when people went to my website I was already
perceived as quite famous because I had testimonials from the very
top people in my industry. I had testimonials from Fortune Magazine,
Glamour Magazine and all these places.
The reason why I was able to do it so quickly is because I had been
cultivating those relationships for a very long time. For some people,
like Marie, it was six months. For other people it was 10 years.
I think that we can never start building these mutually beneficial
relationships too early. If it’s helpful I can explain a four step process
to connect with influencers.
Jordana:
Yes, please.
Selena:
Step number one is to identify who you want to connect with and do
your research on them. This is going to depend on the industry you're
in. If you're a health coach, maybe it’s somebody like Kris Carr. It
could be someone who is five years ahead of you that you just really
admire.
You identify the people and do your research. That might mean
subscribing to the person’s newsletter and following them on social
media so you know what’s going on in their everyday life. If the
person has a book you could buy her book. You want to get really
familiar with the person’s work before you reach out to them. That’s
step number one.
Step number two is getting on their radar; becoming visible in their
sphere. There are a lot of ways to do it. I would say the easiest way
is actually responding to someone’s newsletter. One of my best
friends is Ramit Sethi who has this website called I Will Teach You to
be Rich and he has an email list of 160,000 people.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
After he sends a newsletter he watches his inbox to see how many
people actually responded and really cared. There are times where he
has these really funny jokes. He’ll tell me later, “Nobody told me my
joke was funny.”
Even the biggest people care. They want to know that their work
actually means something and that people are responding to it.
You could just respond to someone and say, “I love that story you
shared. That really connected with me. I can’t wait to apply this tip to
my business.”
Becoming visible doesn’t mean reaching out and saying, “I would love
to meet you for coffee, ask you 10 different questions or get an hour
of your time.” That’s not going to make a good impression. Just let
them know that you're there and that you appreciate what they’re
doing. That is number two.
Number three is adding value. The cool thing is it’s actually so easy
to add value into people’s lives. There are so many ways. If you're
reaching out to someone who is some sort of expert or personality
it’s so easy.
One thing that every single expert and personality wants is more
promotion. They want to grow their business. They want people to
know about them. All of us are, essentially, a media outlet nowadays
because we have our Facebook profile, our Twitter profile, and even
better, some of us have newsletters.
I would say the average person would have at least 1,000 people that
they could promote someone’s work to if not 5,000 or more if you
combine the newsletter list. That’s a way that you can really make a
difference. You can promote their stuff on Facebook and tag them.
There are some girls on my email newsletter list. Some of them don’t
even have that big of a social media presence or maybe they have 50
followers on Twitter. Every time I write an article they are
consistently promoting it and sharing their passion about it with their
network. Over and over again I definitely notice these people and
have a really great feeling about them.
Another way is a really easy example I like to give. If you're paying
attention to what these people are putting out there it will become
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
very clear how you can help them or ways you can connect. This fall
Marie talked about how she was going to be moving to L.A. for the
winter months. That’s something that someone could respond to.
They could say, “Marie, that’s so amazing. I’ve always wanted to be
bi-coastal. You're living my dream life.” Maybe say something like, “I
love L.A. These are my seven favorite restaurants in L.A. and my
favorite dishes. No response needed. I just wanted to share with
you.”
With something like that, you're adding value but you're not taking
anything. You're not asking them to send you a long response back.
You're on their radar, sharing and doing what you can to make a
difference. That’s number three.
Number four is keeping the relationship warm. You might reach out
to someone one day and then want to connect with them two years
later but that’s not as ideal. You want to be on someone’s radar.
Social media is a really good way to do it. You could just email them
to send them updates or congratulate them on things and say
something like, “No response needed. I just wanted to share.”
Consistently be in touch and get on their radar.
Jordana:
I love that. That is so cool because it breaks it down into such simple
steps and makes it seem remarkably doable. It doesn’t seem so scary
anymore, which is so nice.
You might think, “Okay, your goal is to connect with Oprah.” Just
saying that out of nowhere sounds really scary but after you mapped
it into those steps you think, “Oh, okay, great. I’m just going to
follow Oprah on Twitter and then we’re going to start chatting.”
Of course who knows what’s going to come of it, if anything, but you
have really broken it down into doable steps that really anyone can
follow pretty easily.
Selena:
Absolutely. Oprah is one of those harder people but you can do this
with basically anyone. Even Marie Forleo, or any of the top people.
We all know their email addresses. We can just respond to their
emails. They are actively watching their Facebook and Twitter
profiles. They want activity. They want people to comment on their
posts and like things so it’s really easy. That’s what they want.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Like I said, just respond and say, “Your work really moved me. It
means a lot to me.” That’s the purpose of their business. They want
to help people so just let people know, “You helped me. I
implemented your tips. These are the changes I made in my
business.” People are going to love that.
Jordana:
It’s so interesting. I think that so many people think that when a
certain person gets to a certain point in their business that not only
are they unreachable but they also don’t need you anymore and that
you are of no use or you are insignificant. It sounds awful to say that.
You really just made a huge point. That’s really the farthest thing
from the case and that when the day ends we’re all human and we
still want to connect regardless of how much we’ve accomplished or
how little we’ve accomplished.
Thank you for articulating that and really breaking it down into such
simple steps.
You mentioned before that you had some testimonials from people at
Fortune. I also know that you have connections with people at
Entrepreneur, Glamour and really big time magazines. These editors
have become friends and mentors with you.
Can you tell everyone how you’ve done that? How that has
happened?
Selena:
With each person the story is different in terms of how I connected
with them but there are certain underlying themes. One is that I just
feel like people are people. I don’t think it’s a bad thing for me to
connect with people if I just want to add value and make a difference
in their lives.
There is the way that I met my mentor, Patty Sellers, she’s the
Editor-at-Large at Fortune Magazine. She’s the one who created their
50 Most Powerful Women in Business list and brand. It’s an
interesting story.
I was at this event at Columbia University and Geraldine Laybourne
was speaking. She was the President of Oxygen Media. She
mentioned something about how they were looking to do this
mentor’s walk and bring together awesome, ambitious, young women
and connect them with these amazing mentors.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
After her talk I wanted to go up to her and learn more about it
because I wanted to get involved. Of course, she had this long line of
people standing and waiting to talk to her. A lot of people look at that
and would think, “If I have to stand in line for 45 minutes to say a
few sentences to her, what’s the point? I’m not important enough.
Nothing is going to happen.” A lot of people would think, “Whatever.”
I did talk to her briefly and I told her about it. She had her Executive
VP next to her and the people from her Community Affairs team. She
said, “Talk to them.”
I spoke to them and shared how passionate I was about helping them
promote it and support it. I ended up getting a lot of my friends to
become mentees which was really cool for all of us.
They paired me with someone really great, Patty Sellers, and I got to
know her through that event. I stayed in touch with her. I invited her
to speaking events that I was doing later when I was at NYU in
business school but also with the non-profits I was involved in.
We just kept in touch and I also nominated her for this really
prestigious industry award. I just became friends with her and now I
know that if I ever need anything she is someone that I can reach out
to.
Jordana:
That’s amazing. I love that you said that people are people because
it’s really true but I think we forget that. I think that we put people
up on such a high pedestal. We forget that when the day ends we’re
all the same and we still all have insecurities; maybe different ones
and maybe different fears. We all have goals; maybe different ones
but regardless there is a core that we all share.
Selena:
Yes, and I think that we have this script running in our head, which is
natural for a lot of people like, “I’m not good enough. I’m not
important. What am I going to say? I might make a fool of myself if I
talk to this person.”
If that’s what is constantly running in your head and that is the
energy you bring when you talk to someone, they’re going to feel
something. It’s not going to help you.
At the same time I also want to let people know that it’s okay if
they’re scared and shy. There have definitely been times I have
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
approached people and I have been scared and shy. Sometimes I
might have made a fool of myself but I’m glad I did it.
Maybe you approach people and even if it’s six times you do a good
job, four times maybe not such a good job, you still made six really
powerful connections. It’s just about doing it. You don’t have to be
perfect.
Jordana:
With that in mind, I know you’ve said in the past, even though I find
this so crazy to believe, that you consider yourself at points an
introvert.
What are some strategies for networking if you consider yourself an
introvert? Personally, I consider myself an extroverted introvert. I’m
outgoing but deep down inside I’m really a home body. I would even
benefit from learning these strategies. What are some strategies for
this?
Selena:
I’m really so introverted. When I connect with people I’m very
passionate and alive because I’m connecting with people who I think
are making a difference. I want to help them be involved so I become
extroverted in those environments. Fundamentally for me, being
around people all day for five hours, I’m going to feel drained. I’m
not going to have energy.
Also, I feel shy sometimes too but I still think that it doesn’t matter
when it comes to networking.
Something to keep in mind is that if you're someone who is
introverted, focus on quality rather than quantity. We should already
be doing this anyway but especially for introverts.
When I go to an event I have an idea of who the people are that I
want to talk to. Because my energy is limited, I’m not able to talk to
every single person but if there are people that I really want to
connect with I’m going to focus on those relationships rather than
spreading myself too thin. That’s one thing to do.
The other thing is people who tend to be introverted tend to also be
very thoughtful because they are very introspective and they process
things deeply. That’s actually a really great quality because when
you're connecting with someone you don’t want to be purely
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
superficial. You want to connect with them about meaningful things
and add value to their lives.
Sometimes you might meet someone and in the moment you can’t
really think about how you can help them but you can always follow
up or email. I think, for introverts, things like email where you can
think through what you're going to say as well as social media where
you have more control and you can be using it from your bedroom,
that can make a really big difference.
I guess to summarize, less is more and be really thoughtful and
network in a way that feels most comfortable to you.
Jordana:
A lot of people are networking. Networking can be a large part of how
people get new clients. Personally, even though I know networking is
really valuable, it doesn’t always feel great.
I sometimes feel like, not that you have to be superficial, but that it’s
not this laid back situation where you're in yoga pants and flip flops
and just hanging out. Rather, you're in an uncomfortable outfit
potentially. It’s late in the day and you just want to go home.
How do you network to get new business without coming across as
sleazy, needy or desperate? What would be some tips around that?
Selena:
I think there are so many environments that you can network.
Networking isn’t just about building relationships. It’s about building
meaningful, mutually beneficial relationships and usually there are
some sort of professional contacts to that.
You can be networking at parties; people can be introducing you to
their friends. That’s networking too. It’s not necessarily going to
formal business events and passing out your business card.
I really believe in connecting with influencers, people that you really
admire. Even if they offer you nothing in return it doesn’t matter
because that’s not why you're connecting with them; it’s because
you're genuinely excited about them.
When you have those influencers, for me it’s people like Marie Forleo
and Danielle LaPorte, I’m just adding value to their lives. I’m
genuinely enthusiastic about their businesses.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
When you make such a big difference in someone’s business they are
going to want to help you. It’s just natural for them to want to
reciprocate.
I’ve talked to Danielle about my business before. I’ve even shared
some of the struggles I’ve been through. That’s something that
someone can relate to. Sometimes if we’re all saying, “Everything is
great.” Then people don’t really see how they can help you.
If you say, “This is something that I’m really struggling with” then
they are going to connect with that because we’ve all struggled at
some point and they are going to want to go out of their way to help
you.
Or if you say, “I’m launching this new program and I’m really excited
about it. I’m just trying to figure out how to get the word out.”
Danielle said to me, “Whatever you're doing, let me know. I’ll
promote it. I’ll send people.”
Marie has said, “If you ever need me for anything just text me.”
The only reason why I have those kinds of relationships is because
I’ve done so much for them in the past and from a place of just
genuinely wanting to help.
You have to let people know how to help you but not by telling them,
“I want you to send this to your email list or can you do this for me”
but just being open about your life. I would say that’s one thing, and
other people will send business to you. That’s the easiest way. That’s
the way to get business.
Another thing is going to these events and talking to people. Some
questions that I really like to ask people are things like “What are you
most excited about in your business?” People like to talk about things
that they are excited about.
Don’t just say, “Tell me more about your business” or “Tell me more
about a particular issue” whether it’s their health or relationships
depending on what your area of focus is. Then say something like,
“What is one of your biggest challenges right now?”
They could share that with you and then if it’s something that you
think you can actually help them with, share that. Say, “I actually
help women and I help them with emotional eating. I’ve had these
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
results with people and if you want I would be happy to have a call
with you and get you pointed in the right direction.” Or “I would be
happy to help you with that if it’s something you want to explore
further.”
Get on the phone with people and just offer them help. It will reach a
point where they will want to know if they can work with you. Just
say, “I have these programs.” and give people options.
The other thing is when we want people to sign up and work with us
we need to have offerings in place. That’s important. Also, let people
know that you would love to help them; that you can really see them
overcoming that obstacle.
Jordana:
It sounds like from what you're saying that it’s really a matter of
coming from a place of being organized but also really authentic and
coming from a place of generosity.
Selena:
Absolutely. I think when we’re coming from a place of fear like “I
don’t have enough clients. I need to close this deal on the phone”
people feel that, but if you're just looking to connect people because
you want to help them and if they want to take it to the next level
and work with you, that’s awesome. If not, that’s fine too. I think
that everyone feels more comfortable.
Jordana:
I know you started addressing this but aside from the whole concept
of thinking that people are people and whatnot, do you have any
other mindset shifts that you can offer to help people not be as
nervous when they are networking and just feel more comfortable?
Was there anything else you wanted to add?
Selena:
One mindset shift is that “people want my help” or “I can make a
difference in this person’s life.” I think that’s really important because
if you're coming from a place of service there is no fear. Why would
someone not want you to help them? I think that’s a big thing.
For me, when I connect with people I’m just coming from a place of
being so excited to develop that relationship and make a difference in
their lives that there is no fear; it’s just enthusiasm.
I guess there are other things I could say but I think that’s really the
main thing. I think if you have that mindset, just that one idea I think
is enough.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana:
I personally love that people are people. I know that’s so simple but
if you're about to go into a networking event and you just need to
grab onto some kind of thought, I feel like that thought is so simple
and accessible yet so powerful. If I just say, “People are people” I
think it can really make a big impact so thanks for sharing that. I
really do appreciate that.
Selena:
Yes, and another thing I’ll say is that people just want to be
appreciated. I said it before but I think it’s worth emphasizing again.
People want to know that the work that they do is actually making a
difference in people’s lives. That’s the entire purpose for a lot of
people’s businesses if they’re an expert or coach.
Even just sharing, “I purchased your program Rich, Happy and Hot
and that really transformed the trajectory of my business.” Why
would someone not want to hear that? That’s what they live for.
Or it might just be, “I listened to your telesummit” or “I love your
newsletter.” People absolutely love that and they’re looking for that
positive validation.
Jordana, I was telling you before how I recently connected with my
personal hero, Sheryl Sandberg, who is the COO of Facebook and
number five in terms of the most powerful women in the world. I’m
helping her promote her book right now. She was checking in with
me, “Selena, did you get the advanced copy yet?” and I told her that
I got. She said, “Okay, let me know what you think.”
She actually really cares. She wants to know if people like the book.
Is it good enough? I think all of us, it doesn’t matter how powerful we
are, are all looking for validation.
Jordana:
That’s amazing. I think that sometimes people seem so inaccessible
but you made it really clear. You’ve given us all a big reality check
essentially and a powerful one that I think is going to help a lot of
people moving forward.
You’ve mentioned, especially with a lot of these influencers, that
you're connecting with them and you're just offering things. In at
least the way that you're describing it, and correct me if I’m wrong, is
in the beginning you just offer them something. It’s not like you say
you're going to charge them whatever. I guess the question is how
do you make the decision between the times that you're helping
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
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917-572-8871
someone out of the goodness of your heart and when you should
start charging them? When does that shift happen?
Selena:
I think that the truth is as an entrepreneur our time is very limited.
We also need to make money so we can’t help every single person.
Part of our business is that people pay us for services and we help
them so there is only a limited number of people that we can help for
free.
I think with this kind of thing you should go with your gut. If you're
just so passionate about someone, excited about their mission and
there is an opportunity to get involved and make a difference just do
it. Don’t wait.
With Marie, not that I would ever think this way, but if I was the kind
of person who thought, “We need a formal contract in place. I need
to negotiate all this stuff before I do anything or talk to her or offer
value,” then I don’t know if our relationship would even be where it
would be. It would have probably gone nowhere.
When she and her friends Gabby Bernstein and Mastin Kipp were
invited to be on Oprah she reached out to me to tell me about it. I
think at one point she said, “If you want maybe we can also figure
out some kind of arrangement around this.” She was happy to pay
me but also the lead time was so short that I just jumped in and
helped her. It was cool because I got connected to Oprah’s publicist
and everything. Even though it wasn’t something that was formal I
would rather be involved in it than not. It was such a cool
opportunity.
Or Cheryl’s book; it’s obviously going to be a New York Times
Bestseller. Oprah Winfrey and Arianna Huffington are really involved
in it and I want to be involved in it, too. So if I was just waiting to
sign all these deals with people and not be willing to help until other
things were in place then I wouldn’t have these opportunities.
With someone like Marie, she’s coming out with books and she has
other projects too so now that she knows the quality of my work it’s
more likely that we’re going to do something bigger together. In
those cases I think it’s just good to be of service.
Even with clients that you would charge I think at the beginning you
want to offer a complementary session so that you can get to know
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
them. Then they experience the quality of your work. Then you just
let them know, “I would love to help you further and I have this
program that I think would be perfect for you.”
I think that the transition can actually be quite natural.
Jordana:
You definitely make it seem very natural. That’s the good news.
Selena:
Just let people know what you have to offer and if they know that you
have this program that is really strong, it’s been thoughtfully put
together, then they are going to know that it is the best way to work
with you.
They are not just going to assume that you can always help them for
free because that’s the next step. You can say on the call, “It’s been
so great to talk with you. I really feel like I can make a difference in
terms of helping you reach these career goals. The next step if you
want to continue this is option A and B.”
People will usually pick one.
Jordana:
I think that what happens is sometimes we get so overexcited and
also scared that I think it’s coming from a place of feeling relaxed and
faithful that allows us to offer things from a place of generosity as
opposed to starting out thinking what we can get from them. How
can we make it so that they can help us first?
You definitely shifted things for a lot of people I think, so thank you
for that.
You’ve said a lot of things about staying in a positive mindset. How
do you personally stay in a positive mindset? How do you feel like
you continue to stay in a place of faith that everything is going to go
well?
It seems like for sure you’ve experienced a lot of successes but
again, people are people, so I’m sure you’ve had days where you’re
thinking, “What’s going on?” How do you stay in a positive mindset
during those days?
Selena:
I’m not always in a positive mindset because I’m just human like
everyone listening to the call. There are days I really feel tired or
exhausted. I feel like I was reaching out to the media or whatever
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
and no one is responding or I have this task to do for a client and it’s
so difficult and I don’t even want to do it.
That’s just a part of life but I think at the end of the day it’s really
clear to me that what I’m doing is what I’m meant to be doing. With
the good stuff there comes some bad stuff too but I’m just so grateful
to be able to do this work.
I definitely have this attitude of gratitude that’s with me on a daily
basis. The other thing is that I have this amazing network that I’ve
built over time and I actually believe that it’s not possible for me to
fail. The people in my network, everyone wants to see me succeed.
They have my back.
Obviously I have to do work. I can’t just sit on my bed and do
nothing and expect things to happen but if I really put a genuine
effort and try my best, I’m constantly trying to learn and grow and I
have the support of amazing people in my network, there is just no
way I can fail.
That is something that is front of mind for me all the time.
Jordana:
That’s amazing. I love that and I think it would be really helpful for
people to hear.
What would you say your biggest piece of advice is for a new
entrepreneur? I know you're really big on connecting your success
with connecting with other people. Maybe this is a two part question.
The first thing would be, what is your biggest piece of advice for a
new entrepreneur and/or what is the most important place for a new
entrepreneur to put their time and money?
Serena:
I really think it’s building relationships. That’s how we get business. I
think a website is definitely important to a point but there is no need
to spend $5,000 in branding. You might even not know what to call
yourself at the beginning of your business.
You might still be figuring out your identity and your services but if
you have people who are looking to help you, these people can help
you elevate your brand because they might offer testimonials. They
could be sending new business to you. They might be helping you
grow your email list.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
My friend Ramit Sethi for example, has 160,000 people on his email
list. I had invited him as well as a bunch of other really awesome
people to a focus group. I was talking about how I need to build my
email list.
He basically asked me, “Selena, why haven’t you asked me to let me
write a guest post for you?” He said, “I will tell people to sign up for
your email list. I will tell my community of 160,000 people to do
that.”
That’s something that money can’t buy. That’s what I feel like ends
up happening when you build relationships. It’s not transactional. It’s
just that you're making a difference and you never know what is
going to happen from it. I think that miracles happen from these
kinds of relationships.
I think it’s just making a difference in people’s lives, getting to know
them, buying their books, taking them out for coffee. I think that’s
the number one thing that everyone should be doing. They should be
building their relationships, building their network before they even
need it because they will need it. We all need other people to support
us in what we’re doing.
Jordana:
This is great. I’m taking it all in. You believe, and I’m beginning to
believe this too from my own experience, that it really does come
down to who you know, it comes down to who you are connected
with.
Selena:
It comes down to who you are connected with and who wants to help
you. You can know someone but the only way they’re going to help
you is if they genuinely want to help you.
I know sometimes people say “Ask and you will receive.” Ask
someone to promote your stuff to their list and ask them to do this
and ask them to do that. That’s one step but just because you ask
them doesn’t mean they’re going to say yes. They may actually not
want to help you or they might feel bad that you asked them.
Another point I want to make is the only way that it works is if people
want to genuinely help you and that comes from developing a
mutually beneficial deep relationship.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana:
What’s so cool about this is that I think a lot of entrepreneurs feel like
it costs a lot of money to make your business succeed. Relationships
are free in the sense that everything that you’ve mentioned doesn’t
cost any money at all.
Selena:
No, it doesn’t. There is another point that I want to share because I
think it’s so powerful. There are different ways you can make a
difference in people’s lives. There are some ways that are really high
value. One is advice giving.
I know a lot of people on this call have advice-giving businesses
whether they are helping people grow their business or helping
people with their career and relationships.
You could give someone a piece of advice that might take you two
minutes to communicate but that piece of advice could potentially
change their lives or just make a big difference in growing their
business.
Nisha Moodley has become a friend of mine. I was telling her about
this program I created and she gave me a piece of advice that
automatically added $6,000 to my bottom line so quickly. Now that I
have that knowledge I’m going to keep on building on that.
Maybe someone is struggling with a health issue, they’re a busy
entrepreneur and they’re totally burned out. You might be a health
coach and you offer them a piece of advice or a resource and that
could change everything for them.
I think sometimes we forget how much we have to offer but advice is
one of the best things that we could ever offer someone.
Jordana:
And again, it’s free.
Selena:
It’s free and it takes a minute or two.
Jordana:
I speak to so many women every day and they ask how much money
they need to start a business. I myself am a big proponent that it
doesn’t take a lot of money to necessarily start a business. All the
more so talk about how much it costs to create a successful business,
this call has just proven that it doesn’t need to cost anything.
Selena:
No, not at all.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana:
It really just requires a shift in your mindset, being really committed
to your vision and coming from a place of authenticity and
generosity.
Selena:
Yes, you don’t need a website. You don’t need anything. You don’t
even have to know how to communicate what you do. If you have
other people who are endorsing you and sending business your way
and you have even three clients that’s all you need to get started.
Jordana:
Totally amazing. I love it.
Thank you so much, Selena. This has been so valuable for me and I
can only imagine how valuable it’s been for everyone listening in.
I know that you have a free gift for everyone, which is so exciting
because I love gifts.
Selena:
I’m really excited about this free gift. It’s called The Secret of Super
Connectors and it’s basically teaching people how to add massive
value in people’s lives by connecting them to other people.
When you think about it, all the best opportunities in life come
through other people. Whether it’s a great speaking opportunity, a
great potential client someone is introducing you to, someone that
they may want to hire for their business, whatever it is I just feel like
connecting is one of those things that could take five minutes to write
an email but it could really transform someone’s life. It’s a skill that I
think people would really benefit from learning.
So I have this little ebook about it and I have some specific scripts
that they can use. I really break it down and make it super simple.
People
can
get
that
at
my
website.
It’s
www.S2Groupe.com/embarkability. They can just download it right there.
Another thing is I have a newsletter if people are interested in that.
In my newsletter I invite people to special events I do in New York
City where they can connect with other awesome women business
owners to grow their businesses.
I’m also going to start doing free teleseminars and I also do events. I
have a few events that are completely free of charge and people love
them. They ask all the time, “Why aren’t you charging?” but I just
want to give back.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
I have things like that and if you join my newsletter you will have
access to all of those things.
Jordana:
I can definitely speak to that. I’ve been to Selena’s event and they
are great. Whether or not you are in the New York City area or going
to stop by, regardless, sign up for her newsletter.
Selena, I think you are really a model of the whole concept of the art
of giving. I feel like you should write a book called The Art of Giving.
Selena:
That’s such a good name.
Jordana:
You can pocket that one. It’s so admirable and it’s such a lesson in
terms of not only to come from a place of generosity when you're
giving but also to know that even though you're not necessarily
giving to get back, you will, because of the place of which you're
giving. Does that make sense?
Selena:
Yes, that makes a lot of sense.
Jordana:
Again everyone, it’s www.S2-Groupe.com/embarkability and there
you can pick up this fabulous gift.
Selena, I’m sure you can speak to this as well. One of the things that
has really helped me move forward and get unstuck has been
continuing to learn from experts, teachers and coaches and taking in
lots of great information.
Selena:
Definitely.
Jordana:
That is why I think events like these can be so valuable because you
have access to such high quality content from so many different
experts in one place.
You can listen to them at any point in time. You can listen to them
when you're driving, when you're cleaning the house or when you're
working out. It really can be so amazing. It’s like what you were just
saying, Selena, how hearing just one little piece of information from
someone can help you totally change how you think.
With all that in mind, we’re going to be putting together a success kit
for everyone. It contains all the recordings of the calls along with
extra bonuses from our guests.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
If you don’t want to worry about listening to all these calls this week,
if you would like to have them to listen to when you are ready and
have them for your reference in the future, along with all of these
sweet
bonuses,
you
can
pick
them
up
at
NewEntrepreneurBusinessBlueprint.com/replay.
I personally will generally find during these events a few calls from
the event that really hit home for me. I will listen to them again and
again.
Go
to
the
website
NewEntrepreneurBusinessBlueprint.com/replay and you will be able
to listen to the recording for the next 24 hours for free.
Also you’ll be able to pick up the success kit for only $97 before it
goes up to $197. The $97 is for a limited time so be sure not to miss
out.
Again, Selena, thank you so much for your time. This has been so
valuable for me and I can only imagine how valuable it’s been for
everyone else.
Is there anything else that you want to share with our listeners?
Selena:
I have two really quick things. One, I think that this toolkit that
you're putting together is amazing. I know that when I started my
business a huge advantage that I had was that I invested in my
education. I didn’t just quit my job and then just start a business and
spend six months to a year trying to figure things out as I was trying
to get clients.
I was prepared and that’s because I bought things like your toolkit so
that I was ready to hit the ground running. I think it’s an amazing
resource and the price point is so accessible to people so I definitely
encourage them to do that.
The second thing is that if people want to connect with me they can
also feel free to send me an email. My email address is Hello@S2Groupe.com. If people found the call helpful I would love to hear from
them because I like to know that I’m making a difference. If they
have any success stories they can also feel free to share that with
me.
Jordana:
That’s great. I love that. Thank you for making yourself so accessible.
Selena:
You're welcome.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana:
I love it. Thank you again, Selena, so much. It was such a pleasure
speaking with you today and thank you so much for sharing all of
your gifts and brilliance with the world. I really appreciate it.
Selena:
Thank you. I’m so honored to be a part of this.
Jordana:
Until next time, goodbye, Selena.
Selena:
Goodbye, Jordana.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871
Jordana Jaffe, your telesummit host, is
committed to teaching women all over the
world how start and grow their own
successful businesses.
But that’s certainly not where Jordana first
begun. Jordana graduated with a major in
English from a small Liberal Arts College in
Pennsylvania, completely clueless, like
most grads nowadays, about what she
wanted to be when she “grew up.”
And so her journey began. Within a few
years, she stumbled upon entrepreneurship
as a possibility when her mom suggested
that she start her own organizing business.
Jordana Jaffe
Business Coach for Women
Contact Jordana Jaffe
Email:Jordana@embarkability.com
Website:www.embarkability.com
At that point, Jordana had felt like she had
spent way too much time (read: years)
contemplating about what she was really
meant to do with her life. And as scary and
confusing as starting her own business
seemed, the thought of spending one more
day feeling unhappy and purposeless was,
simply put, not an option.
So she taught herself, from the ground up,
how to succeed as an entrepreneur. After
building a successful organizing business,
she decided to share her secrets to success
with other aspiring women entrepreneurs.
Today, Jordana coaches women worldwide
on how to start and grow their own
successful businesses so that they can
generate consistent cash flow, make a big
impact, and keep the faith throughout their
journeys.
Jordana Jaffe
Jordana@embarkability.com
www.embarkability.com
917-572-8871