1. society
2. social institution
3. marriage

 G ARY LEWIS
D IRECTOR OF MUSIC,O RGANIST
BLCMUSIC@ BETHEL - MADISON. ORG
 S ANDY RIPP
W EDDING S ECRETARY
SANDY@ BETHEL - MADISON. ORG
Bethel
 P ASTOR S COT S ORENSEN
 POSSIBLE SCRIPTURE READINGS
S ENIOR P ASTOR
SCOTS@ BETHEL - MADISON. ORG
Here is a short selection of scripture readings for you to consider.
Other favorite passages may be used. Please discuss with your Pastor.
†
OLD T ESTAMENT READINGS
GENERAL T HEME
Genesis 1:26-31
Male and female created by God
Genesis 2:18-24
God creates man and woman
Genesis 24:48-51
Marriage of Isaac and Rebekah
Ruth 1:16-17
Do not press me to leave you
Song of Solomon 2:10-13
Love in the spring
Song of Solomon 5:16
What my lover is like
Song of Solomon 8:7
Unquenchable love
Isaiah 61:10-11
I will greatly rejoice in the Lord
Isaiah 63:7-9
The steadfast love of God
Jeremiah 32:38-41
God’s faithfulness
Jeremiah 33:11
The voice … of gladness
Psalms: 29, 33, 34, 63, 100, 117, 127, 128, 136, 150
Hosea 2:19-20
And I will take you for my wife forever
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NEW T ESTAMENT READINGS
Romans 1:1-2
I Corinthians 7:1-7
I Corinthians 12:31-13:13
Ephesians 5:21-33
Colossians 3:12-17
Philippians 2:5-11
I John 3:16; 4:7-19
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T HE GOSPELS
Matthew 19:4-6
John 2:1-10
John 15:9-12
John 17:22-23
Wedding Manual
GENERAL T HEME
A living offering
Marital duties of husband & wife
The song of God’s love
Marriage and the church
Live in love and thanksgiving
Attitudes to build a marriage
Teaching on love
GENERAL T HEME
Faithfulness in marriage
The wedding at Cana
Love one another
Christ’s prayer for love and unity
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 11
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH
312 Wisconsin Avenue
Madison, WI 53703 ▪ 608-257-3577
bethel@bethel-madison.org
www.bethel-madison.org
 CONGRATULATIONS
ON
YOUR DECISION TO BE MARRIED
On behalf of Bethel Lutheran Church, we rejoice with you in your
upcoming marriage. I, and all of those involved with weddings at Bethel,
want to make your wedding and your marriage an abundance of blessings.
When asked, I always encourage couples to be married in their home
congregation. But, if you do not have a church home, we at Bethel would
be honored if we can serve you in this very special way.
A Christian wedding takes place within a service of worship. This means
that wedding planning is done with careful and prayerful consideration.
The joy of the marriage ceremony is reflected in the prayers, praise, and
thanksgiving of those who come together for this special occasion.
We consider the estate of marriage to be a most holy and special bond,
and are pleased that we can play a part in this special time for you. This
booklet is intended to give you all the information necessary to make
your wedding meaningful. You have my assurance that we at Bethel will
do all we can to ensure it all flows smoothly. The following information
is provided to assist in making your wedding a beautiful and joyful celebration, which will reflect upon the sanctity of the marriage covenant.
We look forward to meeting with you both, and assisting in making this
an extraordinary and memorable time.
Yours in Christ,
Sandy Ripp
Wedding Secretary
2014 Pre-marital Wedding Conferences
Saturday, February 1
9:00 am – 12:30 pm
Saturday, May 17
9:00 am – 12:30 pm
Saturday, September 13 9:00 am – 12:30 pm
 SAMPLE W EDDING VOWS
Here is a selection of different vows for you to consider for your wedding,
or you may write your own, upon approval of the Pastors.
†
VOW ONE
I, N.., take you, N.., to be my husband/wife, and do in the presence of God
and before this congregation, promise and covenant to be a loving and faithful wife/husband to you, so long as we both shall live.
†
VOW TWO
I, N.., take you, N.., to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold from this
day forward, for better, for worse; for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in
health; to love and to cherish, so long as we both shall live.
†
VOW T HREE
N.., the Scripture tells us to love God with all our heart, soul, strength and
mind. Today, as I become your husband/wife, I make this covenant to so
love God, and to so love you. With all my heart I love you, with all that is in
my soul I love you, with all my strength and energy I will love you, and with
all the powers of my mind I will love you. Always and only will I love you,
as long as we both shall live.
†
VOW FOUR
In the name of God, I, N.., take you, N.., to be my wife/husband. I offer you
my strength and my support; I pledge my loyalty and faith; I offer my hope.
I will trust, respect and encourage you; I give you my love in all the circumstances of life, as long as we both shall live.
†
VOW FIVE
I take you,
, to be my wife/husband and these things I promise you:
I will be faithful to you and honest with you; I will respect, trust, help and
care for you; I will share my life with you; I will forgive you as we have been
forgiven; and I will try with you to better understand ourselves, the world, and
God; through the best and the worst of what is to come until death parts us.
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 10
 NOW W HAT?
 T HE MARRIAGE SERVICE
W E ARE GETTING MARRIED
SPECIFICS - CONTINUED
†
VOWS Chosen by the bride and groom.
†
GIVING
OF
†
RINGS
Minister: The wedding ring is the outward and visible sign of an inward and
spiritual grace, signifying the uniting of this man and this woman in holy
matrimony, through the church of Jesus Christ our Lord.
Let us Pray, Bless, O Lord, the giving of these rings; may they who wear
them live in love and fidelity, and continue in your service all the days of
our lives, through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Congregation replies: Amen.
The bride and groom exchange rings with these words:
I give you this ring as a sign of my love and faithfulness.
†
ACCLAMATION
OF
MARRIAGE
The bride and groom join hands, and the minister announces their marriage by saying:
(Name) and (name), by their promises before God and in the presence of this
assembly, have joined themselves to one another as husband and wife.
Blessed be the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit now and forever.
Those whom God has joined together let no one separate.”
Congregation replies: Amen.
†
LIGHTING OF THE UNITY CANDLE OR OTHER CULTURAL T RADITION
(OPTIONAL ) The bride and groom may kneel
†
MARRIAGE BLESSING One of two options
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PRAYERS Two of three options, then LORD’S PRAYER
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HOLY COMMUNION (OPTIONAL )
†
BLESSING One of three options.
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INTRODUCTION
†
RECESSIONAL
OF THE
W HERE
TO
BEGIN
It is important to begin preparing for your wedding by contacting the church
office at 608-257-3577 x 231. Please inquire about the availability of the
Sanctuary, prior to booking your reception, band, photographer, etc. Dates
for weddings can be reserved only through the church office.
†
MEETING WITH THE W EDDING SECRETARY
AND W EDDING COORDINATOR
The Wedding Secretary serves as your main resource person in relation to
your ceremony at Bethel. She will assist in asking and answering the many
questions you have concerning your wedding. She coordinates with the musicians and schedules the wedding coordinator who will choreograph your
rehearsal and help with the details of the wedding day. About six to eight
weeks prior to your wedding, you will meet with your Coordinator. At that
meeting, you will finalize worship selections, vows, scripture readings, and
your wedding program. Her goal is to ensure that your wedding day is as
special as possible, having open communication between the pastor, couple,
and others involved in the service.
†
W EDDING W ORKSHOPS
AND
PASTOR MEETING
Once your date has been set and confirmed with the Wedding Secretary,
and your deposit has been received, you will be invited to attend one of
Bethel’s pre-marital workshops. The pre-marital workshop is required for
all couples. They are held throughout the year on a Saturday morning from
9:00 am to 12:30 pm. During the workshop, you will have an opportunity to
discover a bit more about your partner, meet some of the Bethel pastoral and
music staff, learn about the Lutheran wedding liturgy and music, and be
given instructions for the pre-marital inventory taken by all couples.
About two to six weeks prior to your wedding, the Officiating Pastor will
meet with each couple and will review the completed pre-marital inventory.
COUPLE
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 9
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 2
 T HE SANCTUARY
MUSIC AND REHEARSALS
†
T HE SANCTUARY
The seating area will comfortably accommodate 800. The church is available
to you for one hour prior to the wedding time for set-up, preparation and
photography. Women may change into their dresses in our Bride’s Room
Men will have a room for their use prior to the wedding, but should arrive
dressed and ready. After the ceremony, one hour is allowed for photography
†
MUSIC
As is true of all worship, we gather to praise God and to invite God to be
present to bless and shape the marriage. Everything in the ceremony points
towards God – the readings, the sermon and the music. Your wedding, in
every sense, will reflect the unique character of you as a couple, your interests and your commitments all within the context of worship. The Director of
Music will help you select music that speaks of God’s love for us and our
love for God. This includes all music played or sung in the Sanctuary from
the Prelude through the Postlude. We encourage you to sing your favorite
love songs at the rehearsal or the reception.
Time is set aside during the pre-marital workshop to meet with the Director
of Music. He will assist you in selecting appropriate music for the service.
He will be happy to meet with you further as needed. All music selected
must be approved for worship by the Director of Music. You should not
print your wedding bulletins until you have received this approval. Arrangements with vocalists and other musicians are your responsibility, and
must be approved by the Director of Worship and Music. Their fees should
be paid by you directly. Bethel is happy to recommend soloists and instrumentalists as needed. The use of pre-recorded music is not permitted.
†
REHEARSALS
Rehearsals are scheduled on Fridays at 5:00 pm and 6:00 pm (later, if the
Coordinator agrees). In the event of a legal holiday on Friday, rehearsals
may be scheduled on Thursday. It is requested that all attendants, ushers,
and parents of the couple be present at the rehearsal. The Wedding Coordinator conducts the rehearsal and is present the day of the wedding. Pastors
and organist are not present at the rehearsal.
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 3
 T HE MARRIAGE SERVICE
TYPICAL OUTLINE
†
FORMAL SEATING
†
PROCESSIONAL
OF
PARENTS
AND
GRANDPARENTS
The bride, groom, and wedding party stand in front of the minister.
†
W ELCOME
†
AFFIRMATION
OF
FAMILIES (OPTIONAL )
Minister says to the families: “Will all of you, by God’s grace, uphold and care
for (name) and (name) in their life together?” Congregation replies: We will.
†
GREETING
Minister: The grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the communion of the Holy Spirit be with you all. Congregation: And also with you.
†
PRAYER
†
SCRIPTURE READINGS Two or three, chosen by the bride and groom.
†
SERMON
†
T HE CHARGE
OF THE
DAY One of two options.
The Lord God in his goodness created us male and female, and by the gift of
marriage founded human community in a joy that begins now and is
brought to perfection in the life to come. Because of sin, our age-old rebellion, the gladness of marriage can be overcast and the gift of family can
become a burden. But because God, who established marriage, continues
still to bless it with his abundant and ever-present support, we can be sustained in our weariness and have our joy restored.
(Name) and (name), if it is your intention to share with each other your joys
and sorrows and all that the years will bring, with your promises bind yourselves to each other as husband and wife.
The bride and groom join hands.
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 8
 SERVICE OUTLINE
†
AND
CHRISTIAN ORDER
OF
 PHOTOGRAPHERS
LICENSE
SERVICE
FLORISTS, BULLETINS AND CANDLES
FOR
†
MARRIAGE
At Bethel, we offer a Christian service in which the wedding vows are made
in a context of worship, prayer and thanksgiving. A typical service includes:
Processional
Welcome
Declaration of Intention (optional)
Greeting
Prayer of the Day
The Scripture Readings
Sermon
The Charge
The Vows and Giving of Rings
Acclamation of Marriage
Lighting of the Unity Candle (if desired)
Marriage Blessing
Prayers, The Lord’s Prayer
Holy Communion (if desired)
Blessing
Introduction of Couple
Recessional
This is a basic outline of a wedding ceremony, and each couple is invited to
work with the Pastor(s) and the Wedding Secretary to personalize their service with music, hymns, readings, and other components.
†
LICENSE
The Marriage License is issued in the Dane County Clerk’s Office,
210 Martin Luther King, Jr. Blvd. in Madison. Monday-Friday from
8:00 am to 4:00 pm. Phone: 608-266-4452.
Application must be made at least six full calendar days before the license
is issued. If your wedding is on Saturday, you will need to obtain the license
the prior week. You may then use your license within the next 30 days
following the date of application. Your Marriage License should be brought
to the Church Office no later than the Tuesday prior to your ceremony.
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 7
PHOTOGRAPHY
AND
VIDEOGRAPHY
In order to maintain a worshipful atmosphere, flash photography is not
allowed during the wedding service. Formal photos may be taken in the
chancel area, either prior to or immediately after the wedding.
Videotaping the service is possible. Videographers may record from the rear
of the church or from the balcony. An unmanned video camera on a tripod
may be set up on the Altar area, and turned on before the ceremony. Prior
arrangements should be made with the Wedding Coordinator to discuss
placement of the video equipment. NO Photographers or Videographers are
allowed in or near the altar area during the ceremony. To request the Bethel
Media Team to record the wedding, please reserve three months prior to the
wedding date.
†
FLOWERS
Flowers may be placed on either side of the Altar Cross and should not cover any portion of it. No flowers are allowed on the Altar. It is your
responsibility to remove flowers immediately after your wedding. Your
florist can arrive to decorate the church one hour before your ceremony and
should be finished 30 minutes before the ceremony begins.
†
PEW BOWS
Pew bows must attach to the pews with ribbon, rubber bands, or plastic clips
(no tape or wire is allowed). Recommendation is six pew bows on each side
(every other pew).
†
W EDDING BULLETINS
The Wedding Secretary at Bethel has samples of bulletins in her office for
your convenience. Bethel does not print wedding bulletins.
†
CANDLES
Bethel has two sets of candelabra available for your use. Candelabras can
have 7 or 14 candles on each side. Bethel will also provide a Unity Candle,
if one is desired, and side tapers.
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 4
 W EDDING FEES
 GENERAL POLICIES
†
†
COMMUNION
If Holy Communion is celebrated, everyone, not just the wedding party, is
invited to participate. Your pastor will assist you in planning this part of
worship.
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PARKING
As parking is limited at Bethel, parking is not available after the Wedding
Rehearsal or Wedding. Guests must move their vehicles out of the Bethel lot
after the wedding.
†
CLEAN-UP
Please assign someone who is not a member of the wedding party, to remove
all personal possessions from the Bride’s Room (and the area the men will be
using), prior to the start of the wedding ceremony. Bethel is located in a busy
downtown area and is not responsible for items left unattended.
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AVAILABILITY
Weddings are scheduled Saturdays between 9:30 am and 6:30 pm.
Additionally, some Fridays & Sundays, starting at 3:00 pm, plus a few other
times may be available.
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SPECIFIC ITEMS
Alcoholic beverages are not permitted in the church building or on the
church grounds
Smoking is not allowed inside the church building
Rice, bird seed, rose petals, or confetti is not to be thrown either inside
or outside the church building
Silk rose petals are acceptable during the ceremony
Aisle runners are not permitted for use in the church building
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 5
†
MEMBER FEES
Use of Sanctuary
Use of Chapel
Pastor
Organist
Wedding Coordinator
Custodian
Supplies
Bethel Media-DVD (optional)
No Charge
No Charge
At your discretion
$250.00
$250.00
$ 75.00
$ 75.00
$695.00
NON -MEMBER FEES
The fixed price for non-members is $1,650. The fee includes:
The use of the Church
Pastor
Organist
Wedding Coordinator
Custodian
Supplies
 Pre-Marital Counseling & Materials
 Unity Candle
 Candelabra Candles
We require a deposit of $500 at the time the church is reserved ($400 of the
deposit is refundable if the wedding is canceled more than 6 months prior to
the wedding date). The balance is due three weeks prior to the wedding.
†
OUR APPROACH
Both Bethel member and non-member weddings are welcome. A minister
of Bethel will officiate at the wedding service. Requests for other clergy to
participate in the wedding service should be made to the Bethel pastor officiating at your wedding. The Organist is provided by Bethel and will approve
all music selections. All couples must attend the pre-marital workshop.
BETHEL LUTHERAN CHURCH 6