1. family and parenting
2. children

The
Briefing
WINTER 2014-2015
A Decade of Difference
A Letter from the
Executive Director
We often become very reflective over
memories, recalling those dear to us and
remembering sweet gatherings and special
moments during this time of year. I can think
of no better time than the holidays to say
thank you to our nation’s military families,
especially those currently deployed overseas
and those recovering from severe injury. It is
a difficult time of year for those who must
be separated from their families, and those
who must celebrate under very different
circumstances.
While these families have given our
country so much, Our Military Kids has been
very fortunate to have recognized many
of their children over the past year. The
activities funded by our generous donors
have brought a little joy into the lives of
our nation’s littlest heroes by keeping them
engaged in extracurricular activities they love
or allowing them to discover a new passion.
As military families continue to face
overseas deployments and cope with the
challenges associated with recovery from the
visible and invisible wounds of war, I hope
your hearts are filled with compassion and
gratitude and will continue to support our
mission. Through the generosity of people
like you, Our Military Kids lifts the morale of
our military families, revealing the caring and
kindness of a grateful country. As the spirit
of the holidays moves you, please consider
spreading peace, joy, and love to our military
children.
Warmest holiday wishes to you and yours
from each of us at Our Military Kids, and my
heartfelt appreciation for providing cherished
memories to thousands of deserving military
children during the most critical time of their
lives – their childhoods.
-Linda Davidson
Back on September 8th, Our Military Kids held a celebration event at the US
Navy Memorial’s Heritage Center in Washington, DC to mark its tenth anniversary
as a nonprofit organization. Over the past decade, the organization has awarded
nearly 50,000 grants totaling $20 million, helping children to stay active and
healthy when a parent is deployed with the National Guard and Reserve or
recovering from severe injury sustained in service overseas.
Five outstanding children were honored at the event, all of whom received a
grant in the past ten years: Collin Squires, 16; Christie Hoeye, 16; Tori Webbe,
11; Alex Barton, 18; and Abigail Barton, 16. Each child has a unique story that
demonstrates how a grant for extracurricular activities can have long lasting
benefits.
Tori opened up the event by singing
God Bless America. She received a grant
to participate in a children’s choir while her
father was deployed overseas. It helped
her cope with his absence after her family’s
home was destroyed by fire. Next up was
a performance by Collin Squires, who
learned to play piano with his first grant.
His love for music, discovered with that
first grant, inspired him to learn guitar and
saxophone, too. Collin sang and strummed a song by Simon
and Garfunkel for the audience at the event.
Christie received her grant for softball, a sport her father had previously
coached before he was injured while serving. She gave a speech since she
couldn’t bring the field indoors with her. With the high cost of her dad’s treatment,
Christie didn’t know if she would still be able to play. But Our Military Kids
awarded her a grant to continue.
“I don’t just love to play softball because it is just fun – softball is my sport,” she
said. “Everybody has a place they escape to – a place where they feel safe. Once
I step on that field, I feel invincible. I feel like I am a part of something bigger
than myself. If I begin to get frustrated at the game, or feel like giving up, my dad
will come up to me and say ‘I’m still your biggest fan.’ In that moment, I feel that
softball doesn’t just change my life, but it helps my dad get through his.”
The audience also heard the incredibly emotional stories of the Barton family.
SPC Aaron Barton suffered a traumatic brain injury and PTSD after being
involved in an explosion in Iraq during his second deployment.
“Our children were at the preteen ages when this was
happening,” his wife Wendy said. “It was a terrible time for our
family that included daily tears, depression, and eventually, a
suicide attempt. My children have been through what most of
their peers, even our family, cannot even fathom. They have
felt very alone individually and collectively.”
Continued on Page 2
Volume 11, Issue 7
www.OurMilitaryKids.org
A Decade of Difference (continued)
Abigail received her grant first, which allowed her to play on a costly
travel soccer team. That team has since won third place in its division
in the national championship, all the while pulling Abigail out of a
depression and allowing her to follow her passion. It may even lead to
a college scholarship.
“Before Our Military Kids, I was lost,” she said. “Growing up a
military kid is lonely. I now receive a grant every year so I can continue
to play the sport I love. My only hope is that every military child can
experience this life-changing organization.”
Abigail’s older brother Alex attempted suicide after their father’s
injury. The changes in Aaron’s personality were too much for him to handle. After Alex recovered, Our Military Kids awarded
him a grant to attend Comic Con in Denver, providing a once-in-a-lifetime experience for a lifelong comic fan.
“My dad was my best friend, more than anything, before he left,” Alex said. “He came back looking like the same person,
but he wasn’t. We had a lot of argument and conflict. I was severely depressed and I attempted suicide at one point. I just
want you to know that what this charity has done is indescribable. More people need to be aware of Our Military Kids because
there are lot of kids out there who need it.”
For those of you who could not attend the event, you can view a video of the highlights by going to our website, www.
ourmilitarykids.org, and scrolling to the bottom.
Our Military Kids is very grateful to all who have supported the grant program during the last decade. Without your
contributions, none of this would be possible. Your donations have helped touch the lives of tens of thousands of children and
provided them with memories that will last a lifetime.
The Holiday Spirit
“It is better to give than to receive.” We all hear that saying as the holidays approach. This year, it holds especially true,
as there are many ways you can support Our Military Kids and encourage others to do the same.
Giving Tuesday falls on December 2 this year. Giving Tuesday is a global day dedicated to giving back, when people from
around the world will come together for one common purpose: to celebrate generosity and to give. The Newman’s Own
Foundation is hosting a fundraising drive and will match your donations to Our Military Kids up to $10,000. Even if you
can only give $10, this is a great way to double the impact of your donation. Make sure you follow Our Military Kids on
Facebook and Twitter – we will post the link to the Newman’s Own fundraising drive on December 2. Help Our Military
Kids turn $10,000 into $20,000 this Giving Tuesday!
You can also support Our Military Kids while you purchase gifts for your family and friends. Skip the chaos of Black
Friday and shop from the comfort of your own home. You can find great deals online with AmazonSmile and
GoodShop.com with some of the proceeds being donated to Our Military Kids.
AmazonSmile is a new program from amazon.com that is a simple and automatic way for you to support your favorite
charitable organization every time you shop, at no cost to you. All you have to do is visit smile.amazon.com. On your
first visit, you will be prompted to select a charitable organization – that’s where you choose Our Military Kids! Your
selection will be remembered so that every time you shop via AmazonSmile, The AmazonSmile Foundation will donate
0.5% of the purchase price from tens of millions of eligible items to Our Military Kids. It may not sound like much, but
all those purchases add up fast!
You can also do your holiday shopping via GoodShop.com. This website has a similar concept – select a charitable
organization (again, Our Military Kids!) and start shopping. You can select from 2,800 participating stores and a
percentage of what you spend will be donated to Our Military Kids at no cost to you. Goodshop.com also lists more than
100,000 coupons and deals so you can even save money in the process.
We thank you in advance for your generosity this holiday season!
www.OurMilitaryKids.org
Kristina Skarstedt was
nervous about her
husband’s deployment.
While SFC Ethan
Skarstedt had served
with the Army National
Guard for 18 years,
nearly 12 years had
passed since his last
deployment. At the
time, the couple only
had two young children.
Now, with five children ranging in age from 17 to 5, this latest
deployment in January was a different story. It was much harder
for her as a mother.
“On one hand, the deployments are easier now because the
kids are older and I’ve gotten used to it,” Kristina said. “But in
another way it’s kind of like cumulative trauma. You become
kind of callous, which is not healthy for the kids.”
Her oldest son, Isaac, is preparing to head off to college
next fall. To prepare, Kristina began searching for possible
scholarships, and in the process she stumbled upon Our Military
Kid’s website.
“At first I was in disbelief that a program like
this existed – and then I was so excited when
I realized that all five of my kids were eligible
and I could apply!”
Isaac, 17, received a grant to sing in his
school’s choir; Leif, 15, received a grant to
play in his school’s marching band; Bonney,
12, received her grant for dance; Lily, 9, got
her grant for gymnastics; and Hazel, age 5,
also chose dancing for her activity.
“The kids are all such different people,”
Kristina shared. “Even though they’re mostly
doing different things, I can tell that they are
each able to better cope with the deployment because they
received the grants from Our Military Kids. They’ve had things
to look forward to, things to participate in, and it’s kept us on a
more regular schedule.”
The grant had a particularly positive impact on Leif. He had
previously expressed interest in joining the marching band at
his school, but the program came with a hefty $700 price tag.
Enrolling him would be a risk for Kristina. Leif had not been
performing well in school and was generally unmotivated.
“I just didn’t know if marching band would do anything for
him or if he would even commit to it, and as the deadline kept
inching closer, I was so uneasy. But fortunately I found Our
Military Kids the week of the signup deadline and enrolled him
right away and gave it a shot.”
The grant only covered $500 of the program, leaving Leif with
the $200 balance to raise on his own. He spent the next few
weeks mowing lawns, stacking firewood, and even washing cars.
All the hard work paid off.
Leif’s summer began with early mornings at marching band
practice in the blazing heat. But it was a stark contrast from
summers past when he was content sleeping in. He enjoyed
putting in the effort, partially due to his love of music, but also
Marching to the Beat
because he immediately found a group of friends with whom
he could connect. He spent much of the summer bonding with
them, which increased his self-confidence. He also got a boost
from all the exercise he was doing. In fact, he lost about 20
pounds – if not more, according to Kristina. The benefits have
even translated into the classroom.
“Academically, you have to keep a certain GPA to stay in the
band,” Kristina explained. “The previous year, Leif had failed
four classes, but this year, he consistently receives all A’s and
B’s. The band gives me a reason to hold him to that, and it has
given him the motivation he needed. His confidence level has
skyrocketed. He loves being a part of something great. I’ve
never seen him so happy.”
Leif’s younger sister, Lily, also benefitted greatly from the Our
Military Kids grant program. Like her brother, she also struggled
in school – both emotionally and academically.
“Lily has a really close connection with her dad, and when he
left, she immediately started to do poorly in school,” Kristina
said. “She would make up ridiculous reasons to call me in the
middle of the day, or call to say she was sick
and wanted to come home. So we dealt with
that for a while, and it turned into a lot of
anxiety. She just wasn’t happy.”
Kristina made the decision to homeschool Lily
this year to decrease the anxiety, but in the
summer, she knew Lily needed a structured
activity to keep her busy. Lily had previously
expressed interest in gymnastics, but the
high price kept her from enrolling. The grant
allowed her to take private lessons, which
helped her cope with her anxiety. She has
improved so much, Kristina plans to enroll her
in group classes very soon.
“It’s made her feel special, which is just what she needed. She
has such a connection with her dad, and she needed something
to fill the void. Gymnastics really made her feel special and that
she was good at something.”
Ethan has since returned home, and surprised all of his kids
with the help of Leif’s marching band. The band performed its
competition routine at the homecoming game, which involved
a witch’s cauldron. When the routine ended, the band began
playing the Army song and Ethan popped out of the cauldron,
surprising the entire band – especially Leif.
“It was nice for the community because the whole band was
involved. Everyone in the stands cheered and chanted ‘USA!’”
It was a memorable moment for all, and one that wouldn’t have
been possible without a grant from Our Military Kids.
“We can’t thank Our Military Kids enough. I still think back to
when they received their grant award packets in the mail. My
eyes teared up because it felt like somebody was recognizing
our family’s sacrifices for the first time. You see families
reuniting after deployments in the media, but there’s a level
of hardship that is never portrayed. Deployments are so hard
to deal with as a family, and these grants made it feel like
somebody was validating that for me.”
In Their Own Words
Dear Our Military Kids,
Combined Federal Campaign
Federal Government Employees: Don’t forget about CFC! Our Military Kids is #12357.
We appreciate your support as you select your charitable organization for 2015!
My husband is severely impaired due to a Traumatic Brain Injury combined with severe PTSD, as well as
physical polytrauma-related issues. Our children are also special needs, the two oldest due to craniosynostosis
and the youngest due to anoxia experienced at four months of age.
Dance is a relief valve for these children, allowing them to experience a positive interaction with the outside world
and escape from the realities of living with a very impaired parent. It also serves as affordable physical therapy
that keeps them active and strongly supports their development beyond their physical and cognitive disabilities.
We are still struggling as a family to find appropriate medical and mental healthcare for my husband and to
wade through the lengthy and frustrating social security process. These battles have spanned many years and
we have a bit to go before we will be fully self-sustaining. We are greatly in need of help in affording this for our
children. There are five children in this household ranging from 13 to 5. All have special dietary and therapeutic
needs.
I cannot tell you what it means for these struggling children to find a positive, nurturing outlet for their
challenges and stressors. To see my daughter, whose craniosynostosis and developmental delays had seriously
challenged her movement and sensory processing, fly across the stage in leaps with focus and intension, means
the world. Through her dance she overcomes all limitations. For my son, his secondary PTSD, autism-spectrum
developmental delays, and severe anxiety disappear as he moves his body to the rhythm. It’s an oasis of calm for
him and brings him weekly relief from the stressors of his dad’s challenges. Finally, for my youngest son, who
has so many body issues on one side from his anoxic episodes during whooping cough, each dance class brings
him into a freer sense of his body, stronger control of his limbs, and a beautiful social camaraderie with his peers.
In short, dance is a blessing in these children’s lives and we want to keep that happening for them.
Your organization’s help made it possible for these three children to remain in their beloved classes. Thank you
so much for your help.
-Rebecca
6861 Elm Street, Suite 2A
McLean, VA 22101
703.734.6654
www.OurMilitaryKids.org