ULTIMATE LADIES’ NIGHT CONTENTS Welcome to the Ultimate Ladies Night! We hope you enjoy the show and your Dating Q&A with our relationship expert, Kate Taylor. To ensure you don’t forget any of the great advice you hear tonight, here’s our Little Book of Tips to take away. How to choose the perfect profile photos 2 How to write a profile that gets results 3 Boosting your views 4 How to get dates 5 Further reading 6 HOW TO CHOOSE THE PERFECT PROFILE PHOTO Online dating is a visual medium. Choosing the best photographs puts you ahead of the competition. No amount of witty text makes up for an unflattering picture! Our research shows that some photos work better than others. of cleavage receive more emails than women the same age who don’t. Under 30, cleavage has no effect. Good Photos Bad photos A Flirty Selfie We hate selfies too but they work surprisingly well online. But you must flirt into the camera – looking seductively away from the lens seems to put men off. Wearing sunglasses, standing too far away from the camera, and group photos all score badly online. Summery photos People seen in summery photos were regarded as more attractive, more sociable and even healthier than the same people in wintery shots. An Interesting Hobby If you want to initiate conversations online, include a photo of you engaged in an interesting activity. For example, playing an instrument or a sport, visiting an exotic destination, riding a horse, jumping out of a plane… These pictures make it easy for someone to start talking to you. The least successful photos in an online-dating profile are of someone drinking alcohol. Put down the glass. Step away from the cocktail. A Touch of Cleavage Women over 30 who show just a hint 2 HOW TO WRITE A PROFILE THAT GETS RESULTS The best profiles are upbeat, light-hearted, and read like you’re talking to someone. They’re also brief – around 250 words. (Men prefer reading short profiles.) Write it in a word-processing document first, turn off Caps Lock, and don’t forget to spell-check. marital status, age, and body type. The main reason first dates don’t lead to second dates is “unmet expectations”, so make sure your profile and pictures advertise you as you are today. Sociable Hobbies Reading your profile, men will form a picture of what life would be like as your boyfriend. Help them see you in a fun, companionable light: mention your sociable hobbies (live music, restaurants, seeing family, going to parties or the cinema) rather than just your solitary passions (reading, Internet, gym, writing). Power Words The most successful female profiles had some words in common. We’re researching whether or not these words actually create more responses. Try them for yourself and see! The words are Yoga, London, Gaming, Comedy and Hiking. What you’re Looking For… Don’t state you’re looking for love, commitment, and to settle down. It might be the truth, but would you say that to someone you met in a bar? It’s too indiscriminate! There’s no need to mention your intentions yet. In the drop-down menu, choose “Let’s see what happens”. What’s the hottest personality trait most men are looking for? KINDNESS Show yours in your profile (mention your volunteer work, charity runs, or how you love spending time with family). Be truthful Be honest about your children, 3 BOOSTING YOUR PROFILE To reach more people, you can buy Boosts which increase the number of men who receive your details. These are an inexpensive way to give Cupid a nudge. There are also other things you can do to make the most of match.com… Check out members who are ‘Online Now’ Stop by the profiles of members who are currently online. They’ll see a little notification that you’re browsing their profile, and will come and check yours out in return. This, and adding members to your Favourites list, are low-key ways of showing interest if you’re too shy to Wink or message first. Stay active Logging in every day keeps you seen as an Active member, and will keep you at the top of men’s search lists. Drop by every day (loading the Match app makes this very convenient – check your Daily 6 on the bus!) even if you don’t have time to reply to messages. What percentage of emails do men and women reply to? Tweak Your Profile See your page as a living work in progress. Whenever you edit anything (even if it’s just to switch photos around, or correct your spelling), the Match computer sees you as a new member again, and sends your profile out to other members. Show yours in your profile (mention your volunteer work, charity runs, or how you love spending time with family). Women Men 4 22% 75% HOW TO GET DATES You didn’t join Match.com to get penpals – you want dates! Here are some tips to ensure your calendar stays full. looking for. Less information is more – if he wants to know your earliest childhood memory, let him ask you over a drink. Similarly, don’t feel you have to answer every question. If something feels too personal, skip straight past it. Don’t email forever Don’t exchange 16,034,895 emails or IMs with a guy in the hopes that the NEXT message will be the one suggesting a date. Sometimes, the less he hears from you online, the more keen he’ll be to meet in person. After 9 or 10 messages, skip a reply. See if that gives him a nudge. Accept most invitations When women tell me nobody’s asking them out, it always means, “The men I fancy aren’t asking me out”. When I dig deeper, it usually transpires that they’ve had a quarter of a million date requests in their inbox, but they’re not sure about the men. If a man seems normal, nice and has no glaring red flags, meet for a coffee. Do it! Getting out and about will boost your spirits, give you dating practise, and you might be very pleasantly surprised… Be online unpredictably If a man knows you’ll be logging in faithfully at 6pm to hear about his day, he can quickly put you into the role of Surrogate Girlfriend. Before you’ve met, that’s way too predictable. Come and go off the site at different times – one day before work, the next at lunchtime. (NEVER on Friday or Saturday nights.) It suggests you have a full and busy life and will make men more motivated to secure your attention offline. Should you ask him out? If you want a “traditional” relationship, where you’re the one being cherished, pampered and courted, don’t initiate the first date. Whoever first asks for a date adopts the “masculine” role of pursuer, forever. However, if you’re happy being the leader in love, ask away. Don’t write epic messages Aim for “intrigue” rather than “full disclosure”. Keep a few things back. You’re not obliged to tell anyone what you did all day, or how you feel about marriage, or what you’re 98% 5 Of men will text a woman within 24 hours of a great first date. For more advice on every aspect of dating, check out our features on advice.uk.match.com Stay connected with us on Twitter @match_UK Keep in touch with Kate Taylor @katetaylorgale Check out more of our Social Events and Singles Nights, at match.com/events 6