M - National Alliance on Mental Illness: Wake County

6*'+4+5
Support, Education, Advocacy
Vol 33 No 5 May 2015
Editor, Ann Akland
ED/tĂŬĞŽŶƚĂĐƚ/ŶĨŽƌŵĂƟŽŶ͗
www.nami-wake.org (919) 848-4490
aakland@nami-wake.org
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Anxiety Disorders
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to be less important than other disorders, such as schizophrenia and mood disorders, recent
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about how the brain creates fear and anxiety, researchers may be able to devise better treatments
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Thanks to our Celebration of Courage Sponsors
Presented by UNC
Rex Health Care
Silver
Bronze
The Akland
Family
The Pearce
Family
CHAMPIONS
Andrea
Chase
The C. Smith
Family
Ellen Airs
in honor of
the Aklands
ADVOCATES
DRG Counselling
Tom & Susan
Hadley
Josie Douglas
Bobby & Louise
Jordan
L. White Family
Paul & Ann
Robitaille
Patricia Moore
SUPPORTERS
Ellen &
Tom Clemmer
Crystal Farrow
Dorphine &
James Galloway
Kelly Goodfellow
Kanki Japanese House
of Steaks & Sushi
Cindy Massey
Jeff Mural
Kathy Smith
William Stanley
Christine Taylor
Sarah Weathersby
Robert &
Chary Sundstrom
6*'+4+5
NAMI Wake County
Page 3
A Dark & Beautiful Dream
Reverie
A story like this doesn’t really have a beginning, but I guess I’ll start
with the formalities to get them out of the way. In 2012 a certain
health care provider diagnosed me with Mood Disorder Not Otherwise
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“Congrats! I’m so sorry.”
You see, it hadn’t come out of the blue. There was nothing surprising
about it. For a long time I had had this feeling growing in me like a
nocturne playing constantly in the back of my mind. It followed me
from the end of high school to my new life in college and it seemed
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a dull, meretricious sheen. It was my fault, I knew, not theirs, as
I pushed away opportunities and connections. How could they be
expected to understand?
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was going on at that point—and really, neither did I. In part, I guess
that was why the diagnosis felt so empty to me: it didn’t help me
understand myself any better. And I believed then, as I do now, that
understanding is the key.
An old friend of mine once mentioned that she suspected that neuroses
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by Davis Muma
were a natural consequence of “considering the problems of the self
deeply.” For a long time I spiraled around the ideas I considered
fundamental to my identity, dizzying myself with the search. I began
to pull away from the world, and the isolation caused me to hide
more and more of what I was feeling from others. I began to have
nightmares every night, the fear of which translated into problems
with insomnia and fatigue. At times I became so lethargic that during
breaks when I didn’t have to go to class I would commonly lie awake
in bed for hours, too exhausted to get up but somehow also unable to
fall asleep.
Eventually things got bad enough that for my own health I had to
withdraw from school. The various medications I had been given by
my psychiatrist brought me little respite—and really, the brands I’d
tried were starting to add up to a truly formidable list. I won’t bore
you here with the details of the lonely and tedious months I spent in
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in a mention of an optimistic attempt at electroconvulsive therapy.
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accompanied with about a year’s worth of both retrograde and
anterograde amnesia.
But at this point I’ve dwelt for too long on the problem, when what
is far more important is the solution. I began writing today with the
intention of explaining the change that came over me that has brought
me out of a dark place. Mine is not an exceptional story. Far from it;
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we’d care to admit. Because of its persistent stigma, those who suffer
from abnormal psychological conditions are rarely able to bring
their experiences to popularly accepted avenues of discussion and
expression. What is exceptional is the opportunity I have now been
given, in the form of my recovery, to help elucidate the experience of
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root of so many of the problems of today: a societal lack of empathy.
For me, one of the pivotal moments in my escape came in the form of,
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1963 novel detailing the abduction and subsequent imprisonment of a
young art student by a simple clerk after he wins a large sum of money
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the two characters, Miranda Grey and Frederick Clegg, as prisoner
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almost entirely in a windowless room underneath Fred’s house. I read
the novel quickly, fascinated by the switch in narration and its focus
on intense isolation. As I got further and further into the story, I began
to interpret the two characters as two potentials for myself. Miranda is
idealistic, artistic, and imaginative, believing that genuine experience
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empty. To reinforce this duality, Miranda refers to Clegg as Caliban,
alluding that the two of them are mirrored in the characters of the
continued on page 4
NAMI Wake County
6*'+4+5
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same names in Shakespeare’s The Tempest. The longer I read, the
more I began to understand that Clegg and Miranda were two studies
in loneliness, each with a terrifying conclusion. One is oblivious of the
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relief in death.
I found myself alone in my apartment one day, reading, when suddenly
I realized that the small improvements I had been trying to make to
my life weren’t going to be enough. At the end of a passage in which
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in darkness, I realized that to me, a life without expression, of silent
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myself for turning inward, for the life I chose for myself in order
to cope with my own pain. I had left so many caring people behind
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ultimately only protected an empty husk of a human being.
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that I had the power to change myself, that it wasn’t too late to make
myself leave Clegg’s cellar. He wasn’t there and he didn’t hold the
key. For me, unlike for so many others, the door was open. All I had to
do was try it and it would open. I started exercising every day, eating
better, taking long walks, reading and writing regularly, drawing,
painting, even singing again. When someone stopped me on the street
asking for a meal, I would buy it without hesitation. I began to read the
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now instead of focusing on the violence and materialism and suffering
Page 4
in the world, I marveled at the fact that there was so much life being
lived. I developed a taste for foods I’d never eaten before, and every
person I saw, I thought then: “I hope someone falls in love with them.
They deserve it.”
I know it sounds terribly cheesy. It wasn’t all about that book. It was
about recognizing that I had been given this enormous gift called life
and that I was young and that I still had so much to experience. A
friend of mine who I had hurt in my own sadness inadvertently helped
me to get over the past. Another had listened to me at a vulnerable
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grandparents and I told them that I loved them, and then I kissed my
dog rubbed my nose against her hair and sneezed.
My point here is that at a critical moment I was able to recognize the
importance of both seeing things for their beauty and expressing that
appreciation to others. That’s what saved me from my own demons.
Now I am determined to give voice to all modes of experience, even
the painful or uncomfortable ones. I know that for me, the idea of
becoming a writer is propelled by an unstoppable desire to understand
the experiences of both myself and others—beyond that, the desire to
link those experiences. I believe that that desire hinges on the practice
of empathy, and that we as humans have an obligation to each other
to try to understand their perspectives. To all of my friends who I lost
touch with: I’m sorry. And to those who I haven’t met: I’m ready for
your stories.
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is the story of what appears to be a typical American family, yet their lives are anything but normal, as the mother struggles with
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NAMI Wake County
6*'+4+5
Page 5
Reprinted from April 16, 2015 Washington Post Editorial
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comprehensive than other recent efforts to reform the system and perhaps has the brightest prospects in a divided
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6*'+4+5
NAMI Wake County
Page 6
1$0,:DNH6XSSRUW*URXSV&ODVVHV‡www.nami-wake.org
PEOPLE LIVING WITH A MENTAL ILLNESS
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Connections Support Groups:
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FAMILY SUPPORT GROUPS
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BASICS is an education program for parents and other
caregivers of children and adolescents living with mental
illnesses. The NAMI Basics course is taught by trained
teachers who are the parent or other caregivers of individuals
who developed the symptoms of mental illness prior to the age
of 13 years. The course consists of six classes, each lasting
Family to Family
NEXT CLASS: Now accepting names for waiting list.
Program Details: Free to family members, partners
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NEW Connections Group in Knightdale
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Stress & Depression Support Groups:
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for 2 ½ hours. Classes are scheduled once 15 people sign
up for the waiting list. All instruction materials are FREE to
participants. Please contact Shea Cleveland at shea.cleveland@
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information.
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NAMIWakeF2F@gmail.com
Les Girls Social Group - Dutch Treat Luncheon
Saturday, May 23, 12:00 Noon, Golden Corral, 6129 Glenwood Ave. This is a social opportunity for people living with mental
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6*'+4+5
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Don’t forget that you still have time to be entered into our drawings for a free NAMI tote bag and $50 Visa Gift Card!
When you help spread the word about the wonderful things NAMI Wake County does and how membership helps us
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form saying you referred them to NAMI Wake County.
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NAMI Wake County
P.O. Box 12562
Raleigh, NC 27605-2562
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Raleigh, NC
NAMI Wake County
May2015
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May Is Mental Health Month
Each year millions of Americans face the reality of living with a mental health condition. During the
month of May, NAMI and the rest of the country are bringing awareness to mental illness. Each year we
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grows stronger. In 2013, President Obama proclaimed May as National Mental Health Awareness
Month and brought the issue of mental health to the forefront of our nation’s thoughts.
We believe that these issues are important to address year round, but highlighting these issues during
May provides a time for people to come together and display the passion and strength of those working
to improve the lives of the tens of millions of Americans affected by mental illness